4 miles today!

Sick but I wanted to keep the habit. So just took it easy. =)

One-month-old

Our precious son is here!!!!

He was born on Thursday, June 6, 2013 at 6:49 a.m. weighing 7 lbs 5 oz, 21 inches long (Lakeridge Oshawa).

Daddy and baby time. Oh how we long to hold him in our arms! I will miss this though the intimacy of having him inside of me. I especially will miss being able to share in the daddy-baby time when hubby and baby would play together. Hubby would rub my tummy and I love how baby knows that it's his dad. They would play this game of hubby tapping a rhythm and baby will tap back and, sometimes, in the same rhythm. 

What precious life I carry! I'm so thankful that God gave this blessing to us. It's a little scary...it's been so long but oh so welcomed! We had our first son when we were so young. We are much older now and I pray God gives us the wisdom and strength to change the things we need to. I'm just thankful for both our boys!

hope

I honestly don't know how my mother lived through and survived the teen years with my sister and I. Particularly that I'm not exactly an angel. lol. Far from it. My son is actually a better child and student than I was. I didn't much care about school and alllll that. But he does, most of the time. :)

Oh but I so was not prepared to parent a teenager.  I knew he was getting to that age but it just crept up on me. And dang... it's HARD!!! lol. I feel like running to my mom and say "I'm so sorry I was such a pain in high school!!! I'm so surprised you didn't kill me!!!" lol. I cringe at the memories of my attitude and back-talk and all that. 

In all seriousness though, my struggle with my son isn't a bad attitude or rudeness (mind you that there's a bit of that with the mood swings). It's getting him to switch priorities and see the bigger picture.  Granted, he is  young and well...immature but we feel that if he is able to switch priorities and build good habits now, he will enjoy his teen years much better.

We, of course, recognize that it is hard for him. Especially, that most of his friends if not all, just care about video games, skyping, chilling with friends, girls and just doing whatever feels good. We understand all that and isn't against those things but within the right boundaries. We want him to have time to hang out with friends, to play games and to talk to girls but all that comes after God, family and school. In it's right place, all those things are good but the problem is the priorities of most of the kids these days are all jumbled up and wrong. And for some reason, real hard work is something this generation is allergic to!!! 

I didn't realize that there is this very tricky balance of understanding him and allowing him to self-discover but at the same time helping and guiding him exist! Sanity and guidance for this momma, please!!!

Man, I used to think high school is brutal for the high schooler but it's even more so for the parents!!! But, praise God, we have Jesus and hope because if our parents came through it alive...so are we.

Hormones much?!?!?!

Woke up this morning feeling melancholy. Had crazy Braxton hicks ALL night and early morning. I had all these mix emotions about wanting the baby to come but at the same time feeling like I'm not ready. This emotional roller coaster is frustrating.

It's my third day home but I still check in at work for an hour or two. Today's the last day that I do that. I've been cleaning here and there at home. A lot of the things I really want to tackle I can't do which is frustrating.

I'm recognizing though underneath all the emotions that God knows when the best time is for the baby to come. He has set a time for everything. And He has deemed it necessary for the baby, for me and perhaps even for Allen and Allen Jr. that we wait for a little while longer. Perhaps to spend more time together.

I'm anxious but I must remember to wait upon the Lord. <3

14 more days till baby's due date. That seems forever. lol. It's getting tough to be in any position...lying down, sitting or standing. I'm ready to have him but he clearly is not ready yet. lol.

Countdown begins...

I have 6 weeks to go before the official due date.  I'm anxious to meet this little one.  I still can't believe we are going to have a baby again.  It will be 15 years ago this weekend that we had our first boy.  Oh what joy our first born brought to our lives.  And I guess, at some point in the last 7 or 8 years, though hopeful, I really didn't think I could get pregnant again.  Perhaps that's why God didn't "answer" our prayers to have another baby all those years.  It wasn't that He didn't want to give us another one but rather my faith was lacking... I didn't really believe He was going to give what we were asking.

I'm excited and a bit nervous as the time approaches.  This definitely change things for the family.  A great blessing, that's for sure!!!  Another addition to the family will definitely create changes.  We'll have to navigate through the changes and discover how to blend the new and the old together.  I am slightly worried how this will affect Allen Jr.  He has been used to being the centre of our attention and love for so long, I wonder if he will feel neglected and rejected when we or I don't have time for him.  The one thing I know though is that he has prayed for this baby since he was 6 years old and he is looking forward to being a kuya (big brother) for real.  I have to make a mental note to get him involved so he doesn't feel like an outsider.  Perhaps he can burp him or hold him in the rocking chair while his brother sleeps.  He has such a gentle and sweet spirit that I have no doubt that this baby will adore his kuya and look up to him.

Praying everyday for the health and safe-keeping of this baby and his kuya.  :)

6 1/2 months pregnant <3